August 6, 2009

Treat Others The Way You Want To Be Treated…

The deadliest phrase of them all. The phrase has always been called “The Golden Rule”, taught by preschool teachers and parents to every young child. Like every rule, this one has some exceptions. Now whether anyone is willing to accept this is another case completely. I am one of the few who understands that there are exceptions.  The exceptions for this rule are very debatable, varying on a case by case basis, I suppose. Now, when I talk about all of this, I am referring to the case of my family, because with anyone else, I am perfectly respectful, just not my family. As I see it, the exception in my case is this: “What if I don’t want to be treated?” and “What if they don’t deserve the respect that I am supposed to give them?”

As far as the first exception, “What if I don’t want to be treated?”, goes.

Basically, I would be more than fine if everyone in my family wanted to just leave me alone. Admittedly, it wouldn’t be easy, but I do firmly believe that it would be noticeably easier than dealing with them as much as I have to. When I say I don’t want to be treated, I mean that I don’t want any interaction with my family. If that were, in fact, the case, I would not only be a much happier person, but I would be nicer if I were ever to see them again.

And The Second…

A more than common problem in my family is that I have lost any morsel of respect I once had for most of them. As for the ones a have not lost all of my respect for, I have lost a good amount of respect for them. There is not one person in my family that is mentally developed or at lest close to being mentally developed, that I have my full respect for. My grandparents are overly ambitious, and it’s taking a humongous toll on my family’s financial being, that’s the main problem with my family, they never grow up. The hang on to every last ounce of childhood that they can.

The fact that they all are trying to grasp on to their childhoods is taking a toll on the family. Their vision is so flooded by living their dreams that they lose sight of stability. They are dream chasers, now there is admittedly nothing wrong with that, however, it should only be taken so far. They are crossing the thin line between being ambitious and being completely irresponsible about chasing their dreams.

A Whole Other Issue.

Today my mother also mentioned how she has noticed in the past couple of years that I have given up on myself. My first reaction would normally be to argue, however for some odd reason, my first reaction when hearing this was to think. As I continued to think, I realized that my mother is right, I have given up on myself a lot.  I think that in order to improve myself, I need to make a list of what needs improving, areas of my life that need untangling.

1.I need to be more respectful of those who deserve it.
2.I need to keep my priorities in line.
3.I need to focus on what’s best, and not what I want.
4.I need to work harder to achieve my goals.
5.I need to quit giving up when the going gets tough.
6.I need to support those who support me.
7.I need to work on my attitude towards myself.
8.I need to work on my attitude when things don’t go my way.

In order to accomplish number one:

Before talking to someone, or before replying to someone, think. Don’t talk, just shut up and evaluate the situation and the possible ramifications of what I plan on saying.

In order to accomplish number two:

I need to keep my priorities in focus instead of losing sight of my priorities in the moment. I need to develop a system to remind myself of my priorities each and every day and every time the opportunity to screw up my priorities comes along.

In order to accomplish number three:

This will perhaps be one of the hardest. In order to focus more on what is best and not on what I want, I need to evaluate every major and some minor situations and ask myself these questions:

1)If I do this, will it affect me for the positive or the negative in the long run?
2)If I do this will it ramify my priorities?
3)If I do this will I have a different attitude towards myself? If so will it be positive?

In order to accomplish number four:

I am going to need to keep a list of my goals, and I am going to need to focus on accomplishing them. Will update once I have more goals.

In order to accomplish number five:

Just because things get tough, does not mean that it needs to be the end. I need to remind myself that if I can make it through the tough times, that I will make it through the rest of it as a stronger person.

In order to accomplish number six:

I need to ask myself who means most to me, and who has supported me through the years. And once I have that figured out, I need to support them whenever they need it.

In order to accomplish number seven:   

I need to ask myself what I think needs to be improved in order to feel like a decent human, obviously  have done this, I just need to keep it in focus.

In order to accomplish number eight:

See number one.

I have gradually given up hope in myself. I notice more and more every day that I do screw up anything good that enters my life in a matter of time. I have also noticed that I have lost all respect for others. Mainly because I have seen the oddest sides of the spectrum of humanity. Things need sorting out, and that is exactly what I am writing to do.

Do I think I can handle this?

Personally, yes I think that if I can keep it all in view, that I can handle this. I jut need to keep all of this in my sight, I need to make sure that I do not forget everything I write. I suppose I should review my writings daily.